Endlessly

It begins with a knotty feeling.It's like a black, shadowy, gloomy, distrustful, menacing feeling.
Pit.
Hollow pit.

A nerve strains somewhere in the center of the pit.Then, it slowly starts radiating.
It's an empty sort of gnawing ache.
You want to spit it out, but you're ashamed of what it might look like once it's let out.
You silently choke on it instead.

You wait.
Wait for something
Right
For a knock
A glint
A beam

I had always wondered how it feels to wait for a miracle.